Toddlers & Tiara's.....I'm Just Now Getting Into This "Trend"

So what if I'm a little late on watching this absolutely heinous (yet wildly entertaining and intriguing) television, it is absolutely insane. The other day, I wasn't feeling too well so I decided to have a "me" (lazy) day and watch hours beyond hours of "crap TV". Toddlers & Tiaras. It's where it's at.

First let's talk about T&T (cute abbreviation for such a cute show...). I did not know that babies (literally 3-6 months) could participate in a beauty pageant. Now, let me defend them on that because they aren't dressing up babies in actual wigs with fake teeth and make up (that's a terrifying image in my head)


My mom was such an arse.

Besides the fact that mothers are carrying their children on stage without them having an actual idea of what is going on (harsh I know) they have the decency to pretend they can communicate fully with their child. For example, the other episode I was watching went a little something like this "This is your contenstant number 15, Heaven (ehh?). Her favorite colors are HOT PINK AND ZEBRA(that took me too long). Her favorite food is PICKLES..." No one can actually know that a baby's favorite color is hot pink. They can't speak their own opinions you nasty nasty lady. Also, zebra is not a color. It is a print. And what baby likes pickles? All I'm picturing is a baby at a movie theatre (preferably Horrible Bosses, it was a delight) eating one of those giant movie theatre pickles. Gnawing on one of those giant movie theatre pickles to be exact.

The baby portion of the show is pretty disturbing but what is even more disturbing is......The Diva Dad. This man (dressed in a print from Project Runway for the majority of the show it seems):



He participated in the "She-Man" contest.

 "Let me see a perfect 10 (head nod), perfect 10 (another head nod), and perfect 10 (final head nod)." I would be infuriated if my father pranced around like a dandelion. Yes. Dandelions do prance. This man "spied" on all of the "contestants" (being 0-8 years old) and would proceed to walkie-talkie the "scoop" he had on them......two words: Diva-Dad.

Enjoy the read ladies and gentlemen. Also, you can now hear me on 91.3 (Shreveport,LA) DJ-ing for pops show. I only come on at 7:10, 7:30, 7:50, 8:10, 8:30, and 8:50 (in the morning) but hey, it's a start! TATA!